Nathan

              On March 15, the Ides of March, 2006 Nathan Andrew Shepherd was born.  Immediately, a problem appeared: he had a cleft palate.  Two days later, our daughter, Nathan’s grandmother, called, “Mom, the news could not be worse.” Tests had indicated that Nathan was a trisomy-13 child which meant that he had an extra chromosome in every cell of his body. In other words, he was extremely handicapped. The doctor said he would not live very long.

              The hospital people offered to keep the boy.  The parents said “Absolutely Not,” and took Nathan home to nurture and love.  And that’s what they did.  Nathan could suckle a bottle for nourishment, but he would never be able to manage solid food as his body matured.  Nathan could smile when he heard his parent’s voices, especially his mother’s, but he would never be able to sit up, roll over, stand, or learn to talk himself; however, his body matured physically like most children do.

              His mother became an advocate for handicapped children as Nathan grew.  I heard she even had an interview with a senator from her state during which time she pled for the proper care and protection of handicapped kids.  She found a group of families on the Internet who had a Trisomy-13 child with whom she shared compassion, treatments and friendship because they were all going through the same experiences.  She took Nathan regularly to his doctor for checkups. I often speculated that because Nathan was living so much longer than most Trisomy-13 children usually lived, that Nathan was teaching the doctor rather than the reverse.   

              Nathan grew physically to the size of almost any normal child and weighed over fifty pounds when he quietly passed away six years and two months after his birth.  His heart could no longer support his body.  Our faith teaches us that Nathan is now whole, running, jumping, laughing and talking on the heavenly playgrounds.

              As I remember Nathan, I deeply appreciate all our family has learned since Nathan was a part of our lives.  First, from a physical point of view Nathan has taught us the miracle of our bodies.  Too often we take don’t think about the fact that we can talk, walk, speak, think, run, all the capabilities that our bodies have that we simple take for granted. Because of Nathan, we have more respect for our bodies.

              Second, the families of Nathen’s parents came together to support and honor this dad, mom and brother – Yes, Nathan had an older brother. These three nurtured and cared for Nathan so that he lived as long as he did.  Most Trisomy-13 children do not live for longer than a week.

              During those six-plus years that Nathan lived, we saw a beautiful example of complete unconditional love.  Sadly, because Nathan could not physically respond, he could not react well to the voices and touches and holding and huggings his parents and big brother poured over him. Plus, no doubt the time involved in just the extra care that Nathen required took many additional hours out of every day and probably lots of nights. I, Nathan’s great grandmother, am absolutely convinced that Nathan lived six years because of the physical and emotional power of unconditional love and all that love involves. Nathan’s life has truly blessed mine,